Will and Sarah: podcast update and caring for your soul

Will and Sarah share a podcast update and chat about energy, reactions, responses, and soul care. Check out the resources below personally recommended by Will and Sarah. These resources, put into practice, will help you better care for your soul. They are helpful in recovery and helpful to prevent future burn out.

Resources:

Get Your Life Back by John Eldredge - recommended by Sarah
https://amzn.to/3hLtSOD

The Pause App - recommended by both Sarah and Will
https://www.pauseapp.com/

The Daily Prayer from Wild at Heart - recommended by Will
https://wildatheart.org/sites/default/files/assets/prayers/daily_prayer_script.pdf

Grace for Today - Will recommends this article to consider how God’s grace is sufficient one day at a time (sometimes one breath at a time!)
https://www.austingentry.com/grace-for-today/

Essentialism by Greg McKeown - recommended by Will
https://amzn.to/3qSAfUr

Anything by Ruth Haley Barton - recommended by Sarah
https://amzn.to/3yrTwyw

Listen to this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/_muhm-Ula7M

Share your thoughts: podcast@sarahgood.com

Now That's Something Good Podcast by Sarah Good is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 4.0

Show notes may contain affiliate links. This is at no extra cost to you but does help support telling more stories that bring more good. Now that is something good! Thank you for your kind support.

Transcript

Sarah:
[0:20] Hey friends welcome back to now that something good podcast I'm here today - Will you're with me, right?

Will:
[0:26] I'm with you yeah.

Sarah:
[0:29] It's been a little bit since we've been behind these mics.

Will:
[0:30] it has been it seems like an age and so guys we get back to podcasting kind of give you an update on all.

Sarah:
[0:41] Things,
will and Sarah Good and family and let you know a little bit like what happened so I guess the first tell you like we're still alive or still good our family still Kickin it shouldn't just been a little bit of a season but before we jump into all of that,
I feel like there's really important information that you need to know and if you've been around our podcast for a little bit you know we love to talk about serious things we love to talk about fun things and basically anything in between you also know we are very serious about
our beverage choices around here especially ones that have to do with coffee and we're coming to you recording this right now on Saturday so it's not Saturday.
Know what day it is this is the Monday after.
But my voice is not used to this after Fourth of July weekend we both got the day off of work.
Which is fun and so we need a lot of beverages so we'll what beverages are you drinking right now.

Will:
[1:33] Do you have like a buffet of beverages on the table.
I have best dad ever coffee or water it's in the best did Dad ever cup and I have a shaken not stirred iced coffee that is Four Sigmatic's Think blend.
Yummy iced and a Star Wars cup yes.

Sarah:
[1:50] It's a Star Wars cup I feel like the cups do matter at this point.

Will:
[1:53] It does matter I've got some pick actually took pictures of it because it looked really cool when I made it I'm going to I'll post those.

Sarah:
[1:57] I also put pictures of all mine so I have three drinks this morning because we haven't eaten yet it's like noon we slept in today which is a little crazy we won't bore you with all the details of her life.
I had a I'm a big college in fan so I had I finished it's about done now but a chocolate collagen Little Smoothie.
Of course I had to have iced coffee that's in my two rivers cup my little iced coffee decaf iced coffee because if you know Sarah Goods got enough internal.

Will:
[2:26] You don't need to go go.

Sarah:
[2:27] I need the caffeine boost y'all wouldn't be able to listen to this podcast just to slow it down and then water you have to have water.

Will:
[2:33] Oh no here it comes guys wait for it.

Sarah:
[2:36] Listen to the podcast for a little bit you know that this past year I have developed an Infinity for gnomes.

Will:
[2:42] I think it's Affinity because Infinity.

Sarah:
[2:45] In both its affinity and an Infinity for cute little gnomes and so I may or may not be drinking my water today in USA patriotic themed gnome.

Will:
[2:59] All the drinks is a good sign that this is going to be a Sabbath type day at the good household I'm hoping speaking that.

Sarah:
[3:06] It so I hope that you will go grab water in a gnome cup or whatever cup you like.
30 or whatever it is and as you know the deal around here is we're going to have a conversation and so it might be willing I talking but when we are having these conversations you all,
you are listening wherever you're listening whatever time frame you're listening you're very close to our heart and our mind so these are conversations that we hope you feel like you're sitting here if we could just transport you all into,
Studio around our little wooden table we'd offer you a beverage or two or three whatever you would like and just have a little chat with us today and so that's what we want to do we're just gonna catch you
on a little bit of things going on around here and then catch up on what's the future of the now that's something podcast going to look like so.
Will you got anything to add so far.

Will:
[3:53] Now that something good podcast is back yes.

Sarah:
[3:59] It's honestly a lot of you have asked and we really appreciate you reaching out we have literally like dropped off the face of
our social media Platforms in the podcast
without really saying much of anything that is not a normal Mo for us we're going to give just a little back story to that but the real short version of the answer is we just had to like we came to a point between
will and I individually our family where we just needed a hard stop and sadly the podcast kind of became the,
our situation where it was like hey we really don't have the time and the energy right now to do it which is sad because it is very.

[4:40] Of our life and our time together so we found ourselves we're going to take you back to April because actually I think our last podcast we posted will do you remember I think was,
it was like the end of March April we knew we were going to take a little bit of a break because Easter was the first week of,
April and if you remember I my work will works at MasterCard full-time and I work for two rivers church love my job there but Easter and Christmas are kind of crazy times in Ministry Church world and so we knew we would take a week or two off there,
just to kind of recoup and we also knew we were coming to a break anyway we are going to take a pause for the summer kind of re gear shift some gears and then relaunch back up for season 2,
that all happened just a little quicker and a little sooner than we originally thought,
we've just had a lot of craziness so we came off Easter and then it was the end of the school year,
just a lot of things going on will you've had your we've got some your parents or aging your parents are older than mine.
Shout out to grandma Kathy she might listen to our podcast but she had a little bit of a fall right had some health things her husband you want sugar.

Will:
[5:49] Yeah her husband buddy just passed away a couple weeks ago.
And but before that he's had dealt with some dementia related symptoms and without you know going into too many the details it's just was a really tough season for her and,
not a lot of family support system and so had the opportunity to really step in and try to,
Corral some of my fans you know family members and just really try to love my mom and help help her and her husband through a really tough season that's been most of 2021 for them and that's that's still going on so going on.

Sarah:
[6:22] So you took a trip in there too which.

Will:
[6:24] Just been a lot of extra extra time helping through some paperwork things and research things and trying to do that all from,
- a couple days off from st. Louis you know all they live in Mississippi so a not a close thing easy to check in on but extra extra coordinating for for the best way to care for them.

Sarah:
[6:41] Yeah so we're experiencing that new season of life that I'm sure some of you listening are well-versed in and some of you maybe aren't there yet of just what does it look like to help love on family yeah.

Will:
[6:49] To care for parent yeah parents and aging but folks in your family it's a it's a new season not one that I was really prepared for,
and it's definitely taken energy it's been it's been good there's been some fruit from it for sure but it's new it's learning learning new things,
tackling new responsibilities and sometimes dealing out reflecting on the past and what was different from the past or what you wish was different what you can only really affect now is how you respond to your today and help,
you know make the best choices forward for a better next next part of relationships and things like that so it's been I mean that's been it's been more than just stuff to do you know it's been some emotional things too.

Sarah:
[7:28] All of those things kind of collided with also we have the privilege so that's on our family side but we have just a lot of friends,
family and friends and family that have just we've gotten the privilege to walk alongside of them and just some really really hard things we just seem to be in a season where there is an influx of.

[7:49] Abnormally hard things and so we want to spend the most time loving on people
and ministering to people and having conversations and just all of those things that bring us life and just
is what were called to all is just being people and love and for people so all of that season has ramped up over the last few months it was ramping up before we kind of took a break and then honestly while we've been on this break it's been,
in kind of hyper gear so we've really been just focusing in on our family and so I had a chance right after Easter we knew you've heard us talk if you go back to the,
episode of 2021 I don't know what number that was will and I share,
with you all from our vacation time in Laredo Mexico we actually recorded then if you want to go back and check that podcast we talked a lot about rhythms and seasons and just how we try to structure,
our family best intentions like we don't always get this right but we try to take vacation time together,
a couple times a year we try to get away by ourselves a little bit every so often and of course we do things together as a family and so I was due for some days alone and got to go you actually have heard our friend Mike boulware.

[9:01] He is he was on podcast I don't know we should check all these episodes will link them in the show notes great podcast we actually recorded that podcast it was our first on location podcast at Woody's Beach and,
him and their family Christian Troy graciously let,
me go spend some time out in their little cabin that just sits on this Lake and it's just far removed from people and it's just beautiful and I got some days out there to just kind of sit.

[9:27] Recoup I already knew man I am getting close to the danger line a little bit there's just a lot going on need to take some moments to recharge,
and while I was at Woody's Beach just a beautiful beautiful time really got to ask some questions but I realized very quickly,
that I was way more worn down than I had let myself into really are known and that definitely I'd let anybody else around me know and sometimes you don't realize how worn you are until you actually stop,
for a moment and.

Will:
[10:01] Take an inventory.

Sarah:
[10:02] Yes your emotions catch up to your physical state catches up to you spiritually just all those things kind of catch up and so I got to spend some time literally I sat outside at one of the days all day,
like I sat in this little I love those what's that little arrow chair I like.

Will:
[10:18] It's like zero gravity.

Sarah:
[10:19] Zero gravity chairs if you don't have one find one there so good I'm telling you I sat out there and just sad,
and listen to the water listen to Nature and God and I just had some conversations but I really realized man I'm a little more worn out
and a little more tired than I realized
and there's a whole lot of reasons that anybody can get there there's a whole lot of reasons I'm sure some of you listening or nodding your head and going oh yeah I know that feeling some of you right now might be in the midst of the just running all over the place I kind of feel like,
collectively we're in this weird season where we've come out of a pandemic we're life really on some levels kind,
bolted to a screech whether your job some people's jobs we talked about rammed up some people's didn't but we all just had to learn a new normal and a lot of things
to deal with and manage and so now we're in a season where we're kind of coming out of some of that and everything is kind of ramping back,
and so just trying to figure out what is all this look like and how do we balance things and what is a good pace and so we'll and I and our family have just been trying to figure figure all that out.

[11:30] From our Woody's Beach time one thing I just want to share with you guys and where are the basis of our conversation we just want to kind of share about today is what do you do and where are you at,
when you realize your soul is weary now I know some of your like your soul Sarah like really like what is that mean and so let me explain that because one of the things I felt like when I was sitting out in my zero-gravity chair.
Woody's Beach was where,
like the Lord was just really like how is your soul like really how is your soul where are you really at what are you doing where are you going where are you at and just being real honest with that and so today I want to ask you guys to just take a moment,
take a breath and just do a little self-evaluation like if you if I asked you and we were sitting there right now and I'm asking you hey friend how is your shoulder.

[12:22] Really not.
Fake answer that you give really quick like I'm okay it's good you know are it's fine I'm fine everything's fine answer not the answer that you tell yourself not,
answer you tell everybody else but if you really sat for a moment and did a quick evaluation of where you're at mentally physically emotionally spiritually what would come back from that and so I hope,
that maybe you're in a really great spot that's amazing and I hope I hope that that is true but some of us you might go man I'm in a harder spot than I realized and that's where I found myself and we came back and we'll and I talked about that you want to give any of your,
perspective on that time.

Will:
[13:03] Yeah that's a great that's a great question Sarah I was definitely very aware of all the things that were kind of the flags for you and was really glad you got a chance to get away and do some reflection which is super good,
and obviously for both of us there's a lot of those things you already you know talked about that were really weighing heavy on us so I completely resonated with,
that opportunity you had to get away and I just I don't I don't know that I've had enough time to get away to really do grids for this whole soul inventory question I've had a few,
few moments where I've had micro things away like a hike or something like that but I haven't had that same opportunity I don't think to reflect so you did awesome,
on that time for you and I completely resonating I'm glad of some of the choices that we've put in place now to kind of slow down intentionally you know to be able to recover some of that soul Soul Care time.

Sarah:
[13:53] Yeah and the reality is we both don't have to be an asshole despair for anybody
like if you have a friend or a spouse or whatever you might not both be in the same spot and that's okay actually it would be better probably in some ways for you both not to be super exhausted so you.

Will:
[14:09] Somebody somebody Row The Boat while somebody's puking over the side right.

Sarah:
[14:12] Okay.

Will:
[14:13] Um but.

Sarah:
[14:14] Oui,
and we've just been in a season and that was at the beginning of April and then since then where I think we've both been processing just a lot of the hard things we talked about,
of 20/20 was really hard as we lost my grandparents and then we very quickly in January lost a very good friend of ours that we had done life.
And cared a lot about,
and then like I said we've just had the honor and privilege to walk through some other people that are dealing with deep grief and very deep hard things and so I think all of that over the last few months is just kind of accumulated culminated culminated,
together.
And just been like okay what do we do and the real question is and what I felt like at my time away was here's a choice we always have a choice right we've talked a lot about will and I are big on our we have a choice on how weary.
Two things things happening to us might not always be our choice like there are things that people do to us or circumstance that happened we had no choice in.

[15:17] Our reaction in what we do in and out of those things in our actions post those things are our choices and sometimes it might not feel like they're always completely our choice but they are and so I really felt like it was hey you got a choice.
Are you going to listen to the warning signs are you going to listen.
It's going on or are you just going to keep going and being like I'm fine it's fine it's okay and to be very honest my personality if there's any type A Enneagram 1 people out there,
don't stop easily and I'm quickly to go it is okay because I really do believe that I do especially where,
pulls in the mix like I know.

Will:
[15:55] Where my hope is all set up.

Sarah:
[15:56] Is almost up but that doesn't mean we can't listen to the things that God is telling us are just the pure signs of like I'm tired or there's extra things happening and giving ourselves space.
Think and process that so.

Will:
[16:09] So here's.

Sarah:
[16:11] Or just say.
What maybe you're thinking like will Sara what are the signs that I would even know like maybe my soul's in a crazy spot or like what signs did you see Sarah because I'm always big when people talk about stuff,
so what are you really talking about like what it what was give me the Practical part and so here's just a few things will you can add some.
I feel like one of the big things I've got to talk about this with other people is when sometimes our emotions don't always match their not an appropriate reaction to the.

Will:
[16:45] The stimulus yet.

Sarah:
[16:45] Or the explosiveness one way or the other is not matching it and again,
emotions are valid but they are a reflection of other things and so emotions are not always fully true
but they are smoke alarms to other things going on and so really paying attention so like if I'm getting like so mad and so frustrated over this
I spilt then you know what like that's not always maybe something else is going on and that happens to us all like randomly but when those are continuing,
going on or you find yourself like I am just crying all the time or there's extra things going on or,
my kids said this or somebody a friend said this to me and now I'm making this narrative in my head about how they don't like me and blah blah blah and it's like hey hold on like that's not what they said this is your kind of adding a narrative or,
some emotional attachment to things that may not fully be based on truth and only you're going to know that for yourself do you have any ones dad.

Will:
[17:47] I would say to you mentioned the reaction,
and when any kind of stimulus or circumstance happens and it becomes like this chemical reaction of immediately there's a boom response for me that reaction is definitely not healthy for me because I tend to want to.
Be thoughtful in a response and not necessarily quickly reactive that's a red flag for me,
I will often start to feel this pressure and I've feeling it recently of all the unfinished things that need to get done so I feel this pressure all the time like closing in on me and squeezing squeezing squeezing me and like you've got so much stuff to get down you got to get it done,
there is there's this red flag sometimes when we sit down at the dinner table,
and everybody I've been around people they been lots of conversations at work I come home and everybody's talking and they're all valid things to say but I just want to leave I like I feel like I'm going it's just
the pressure on stuff is kind of closing in I know that's not me I don't normally operate that way and a healthy sense I want to lean in and be present and here but all those things are,
are signs for me that I'm not in a great place.

Sarah:
[18:56] And you'll know for you and your personality what is normal and what's not so just a couple other ones this is a big one and,
that for myself and as I've gotten to talk to other people this is one when you have a hard time.
Spending time with God when you can't seem to get in the word of God the same way or you feel like you can't pray or going to church or whatever those things seem harder that's always a sign now there's always seasons of times where that,
I'm going to happen I'm sorry guys my voice is not used to it's groggy from a whatever but when that's just happening you find it.
Let's be honest right there are times where maybe we're angry and upset at our circumstances are what's happening.

Will:
[19:38] What's happening and it.

Sarah:
[19:40] It's kind of under a like Rebellion a little bit of like I'm not gonna go spend time with you it's your and you're not might not realize that's what's going on fully.
Part of our I've definitely had Jesus like that where I'm like you know what I'm just a little underlying mad and angry and so you know what no I don't want to talk to you right now Kyle,
Fierro a spouse or friends do that sometimes do we can be honest around here I've totally done that but God before and I feel like sometimes he's like Sarah,
you know I'm already here I hear and see everything,
you're doing and just a word on that I this is one thing I'm very quick to tell people all the time because I think sometimes we have this false View
that when we come to God we have to come to God with everything in order and our emotions in check and everything fixed and that is so,
far from the truth we don't see that in scripture at all because of Jesus we get invited to come boldly before not cocky lie,
cockily.

Will:
[20:36] That with Eric heads.

Sarah:
[20:38] Upwards but confidently and and into the presence of God and he made every emotion that we have,
he made them he put them in us and so we can come to him,
every one of those feelings and not only like can we he wants us to he wants us to come and sometimes it's shouting things and sometimes it's in anger and sometimes it's just really sad,
like I'm struggling and he wants us to come with every one of those things so that's one of those signs.

Will:
[21:13] Yes here's another baby.

Sarah:
[21:13] Here's another big sign to is there's a big difference between,
numbing out and I'm eating to go like I'm just escaping all the time and I'm just tired and I want to watch a movie and so,
I think when we find ourselves doing way more of the numbing of like I'm just going to go binge watch Netflix or I'm just going to go watch sports or,
fill in the blank with whatever your think maybe it's just I need to go exercise way more are maybe I need to go do this or I need to drink more or I need to what I'm going to eat more fill it in with whatever,
the thing is now any of those things in moderation are okay right like will and I like to watch TV and there are some nights where it's been a hard day and we're like you know what we're just going to watch the next episode of whatever show we're watching and that's okay but if we're always running to those,
and it becomes almost obsessive or whatever that is a sign of going hey okay wait what's going on here am I running from something or am I trying to fill something else.

Will:
[22:15] All right am I coming to you or my coming to that thing for Relief instead of trying to go somewhere that's going to bring real restoration or renewal which is what I really need in this moment.

Sarah:
[22:25] Yes and it's easy it is way easier to do numbing.

Will:
[22:30] So convenient season.

Sarah:
[22:31] To do any of the recharging life-giving things and we do I mean we very much had that I mean you talked about the dinner table will I mean there are times,
gosh we love our kids we really do and we love our family but let's be honest they're needy little people,
and when you are warned out in your tired one more person talking to you and one more person asking you for stuff it's hard and often times,
the people closest to us get the hardest part of what's going on in our life because they're closest In and so,
we have had to fight really hard about that I'm going hey they're just asking for something I need to not be angry I need to take an extra breath or,
maybe if I just go play with Lincoln for 10 minutes or whatever it is it's going to be more,
awful than me just being frustrated but the frustrations are real and those are real things we need to look.

Will:
[23:20] Yes so if you're listening gesture like oh.

Sarah:
[23:21] If you're listening to us you're like oh gosh will and say okay like I feel like a lot of those things are going on first of all I want to say like you are not alone don't go beat yourself up.

Will:
[23:30] It's true.

Sarah:
[23:31] And that leads me to the next thing is like so what do I do when I find myself here and so we'll know we're just having a conversation about that there's a lot of resources we can give you that will talk way better about all this stuff than will and I are right now this is just kind of a.
Behind the curtain of what will and I have been going through an experience and what God is teaching us along the way and I will say please please please hear us when we were talking this is not.
The other side of all of this and we now have it mastered let us tell you all of the ways you need to do this sole care or rest or whatever that is not it we are in the thick of it right now figuring out how to manage,
exhaustion in grief and hard things while also just doing life and all of that stuff so here's the here's the question what do I do when I find myself,
in the spot so here is my number one recommendation you have to have Grace for.

[24:28] So in Matthew there is a really well-known passage of scripture where Jesus says you need to love the Lord your God with all of your heart with all of your mind with all of your strength with all of your soul.
And then he says this in you need to love your neighbor as yourself and,
often skip over that and God really highlighted this verse for me probably I mean it's been a couple years ago but then.
It doesn't matter why but in the last six months it came up again and I've gotten to have some conversations because we're really good sometimes we would say like I'm pretty good about loving my neighbor,
but the question is are you could you love your neighbor even better if you loved yourself,
and the question is also yeah if you would go do this for your neighbor why wouldn't you do it to yourself you wouldn't say those things you wouldn't have cell,
that's negative to your friend or your neighbor or sometimes we do to people we don't know but that's a whole nother conversation for another time but you're going to say most of the time nice and kind things but we don't do it to ourselves,
friend came to you and was like oh my goodness like I'm,
I'm just I feel like I'm running this crazy race and I'm exhausted and blah blah blah I was just sharing their heart you wouldn't look at him go like well you know what you probably should just go suck it up a little more and just go try a little harder and you know just put on your big girl pants and your big boy pants and just
go work harder and you can do it no you go you know what oh my gosh what I'm so sorry like sorry you've been going through this hard time you know what.

[25:58] What can I do to help you get some rest or like help you go do something that's the kind of stuff you would do but we are so quick to say those things and the best things
everybody else and often we don't do it to ourselves so having Grace I'm the kind of person that when I get worn down I'm like oh my goodness I'm a failure how did I get here like I should know better like what or whatever
and whatever blah blah blah and I'm beating myself up over being,
tired and being a little rundown and that is like the stupidest thing you could do and so I would just say and Friends,
have some Grace for yourself have some grace to the things that you have been through,
and love yourself so that you can love your neighbor and more importantly you can love God with everything that you've got.
Guys.

Will:
[26:47] That's good yes have Grace with yourself but also don't be stupid you can have Grace with yourself but then continue to follow the exact same things that you've been doing and not take some time,
or whatever that really sort of real renewal looks like for you so I would say have Grace with yourself yes but don't continue down the same path of you're going to end up in the same destination as you were just trying to get yourself out of.

Sarah:
[27:09] So here's two things that I really think I've been focusing on after my time in April of just going hey what do I do where do we go from here how do we just continued to Pace ourselves and one of the things before I get to the to,
is this reminder that I felt like this is not a quote to Sarah Goode I don't know who said it originally but I remember just it and I've been repeating it over and over myself is,
what got you here didn't take a day and what's going to get you out of it isn't going to take a day meaning.
Takes some time and that's part of the gray.

Will:
[27:44] Yes here's one's good.

Sarah:
[27:44] Here's one thing that we've.

Will:
[27:46] Known again in the season.

Sarah:
[27:48] For us and our family is we need to slow down like sounds a little crazy coming off a pandemic when things were a little slower.
We need to pick and choose we need to be able to slow down and make sure that we were making the best yeses for our family and for ourselves in this season,
something I don't talk about a lot is I do have some weird random healthy things and so that has been an extra part in this season is I have been dealing with some health flare-ups that just I mean unfortunately kind of make it where I have to slow down because.

Will:
[28:19] Because there are times where I just.

Sarah:
[28:20] Times where I just can't keep up and run the normal Pace that I would like to and so just going okay what do I need to do to literally take care of my body so that I can continue to function and slow down.

Will:
[28:32] So a couple of.

Sarah:
[28:33] Always we've been slowing down and again this looks different for everybody but we're also big.
Tickly just trying to give tips and I also like I said we have not done this well perfectly for me.

Will:
[28:44] I'm sorry.

Sarah:
[28:46] Felt like back in April God told me pretty clearly that for myself I needed to in May June and July very much limit the yeses that I,
outside of my job that I do you know that I have commitments to and love and a couple other strong commitment side already made.
I needed to say knows a whole lot more NOS than yeses now it was it's for a season now I would also argue,
I'm not going to come out of July and get to August and be like oh no I'm going to say yes to every single thing
that's not what I'm saying but I knew that God was really just saying hey I need you to be very very very aware,
of all of your yeses that you are making now part of that for me and our season was
I knew that God was leading us into some things and situations that we're going to require some time and energy that I wouldn't be able to have if I was making other yeses that weren't as important and so
I am really glad I can tell you.
Two-thirds of the way through that it has not always been easy I have had to say some knows two things that I would really like to do it's easy to say knows the things you're like I didn't want to do it anyway it's really hard to say no to things that seem good.
Sometimes you might.

Will:
[29:57] You obligated to do.

Sarah:
[29:59] Or you just you want to do and I've had had to do that but I have seen in the middle of that how God has for you,
time in space for me to do some of the other things that were most important and to be a part of situations and conversations and life events that I wanted to be a part of that had I made other yeses I might not have been able.

Will:
[30:20] This is solid life advice because if you operated a hundred percent all the time you will never have any percent available
to take on something like actually good and actually true that you need to be part of that God has put you here on this Earth to be part of so keep some Capacity open as a lot it's not just in reaction to going through a tough time that's a,
from here forward.

Sarah:
[30:40] And that's something that I think you hear us talk about the enemy we and our faith Journey believe in all of that and he wants to keep us busy because when we are so busy that we can't kind of think past ourselves sometimes.
We're not doing all the life-giving things are not aware of like.
I could have this conversation or hey I have time to invite this person over I can go grab coffee here or and that's going to look very different for every one of you listening and only you'll get to.

Will:
[31:10] What that is but I think so often.

Sarah:
[31:10] But I think so often we buy into this lie that we do have to be busy and we have to do this in our kids have to play every sport and I have to be at everything anybody asked me to do and and you just don't.
The pandemic taught us nothing it was like man there's a lot of things we.

Will:
[31:26] And is not required for your life to thrive.

Sarah:
[31:29] That means so like for some of you listening you're probably going Sarah there is no way I could say no to some of these things and let me just tell you first of all I get you,
I would be a borderline people-pleaser and I have learned a lot along the way but there are definitely times where I tell you could tell you I have said yes to things that I didn't really want to do and didn't really feel like I was supposed to do,
felt like I was obligated or didn't have a good way out of.

Will:
[31:55] Easier than saying no.

Sarah:
[31:57] And I know that's hard and that will come up in a million ways for all of you all the time and I would just say,
every situation I will let me learn one trick I've had to tell you to tell you a tip sure let me share a tip and so so for some of you this might be,
and I'm going to give it to you in two ways for will on I since we're married I will often say before I make a commitment whether I think I want to do it or not I will say I've got to go check my calendar and talk to Will.
Oftentimes I will sometimes say yes to things without even thinking,
because in the moment I feel I'm really just not thinking or to because some of that obligation thing or somebody standing there I don't know how to say no and by giving myself the time,
actually look at my calendar to actually talk to will to actually think about it give me a moment.

Will:
[32:43] Yes to actually think.

Sarah:
[32:44] Is this really the best thing does this really make sense if I add this to the calendar what else does that mean because you've heard it said probably every yes is a no to something else,
they count desperately because if I fill my calendar every night of the week and I've not been here to do stuff with my kids.

Will:
[33:02] You've said no to your kids.

Sarah:
[33:03] I've said no to them so you are saying no to something and there's a lot of books and resources we won't harp on that now if you're saying hey cigarette like I'm single I'm not in a relationship with somebody awesome I,
talk to a single mom friend of mine about this recently,
find a friend find somebody else that you could use as your kind of backup person or it really is okay to say you know what I need to take a 24 hours or a couple days let me get back to you I need to go look at that we just feel this undue social.

Will:
[33:30] It's so easy to say I'm Nick I'm gonna check my calendar first and you don't have to say that you have your calendar with you you can check your calendar thoughtfully and.

Sarah:
[33:38] And so there's ways to do that nicely and of course there are things you want to do and people you want to hang out or sometimes just like hey we don't have a margin right now but could we reschedule could we think Camille.
Or just think so anyway slowing down making the best yeses what does that mean what does that look like.
Person in every season there's going to be different times of.

Will:
[34:01] That's right so.

Sarah:
[34:02] Another just big here's number two at the tip so first one is slow down whatever that looks like for you and that's what we've just been trying to do number 2 for me is this is like what brings you life.
Things are rejuvenating and do more of those and so in a season when you are feeling just particularly stress particularly White.
Um you do need to do more of the life-giving things there should be way more of the Things fill in you up then pouring out and that is not
is that is not wrong that is the best thing you can do and again we can talk more about
I know there are seasons and it's hard and trust me you are talking to the person that could make all the excuses for all of the reasons why I can't make myself or other things a priority
so you probably can't tell me excuse I haven't heard because I probably.

Will:
[34:49] She's probably made it up yeah.

Sarah:
[34:50] Probably already said it made it up and I have really good friends that look at me and go Sarah.
And God love them and they're probably listening to this thank you I love you for all of that so but what things are life-giving I had to literally I know it sounds dumb I had to make a list because I would have a friend that would talk about this and I'm,
this bring me life like what is and let me explain what that means more is again it's things that fill you up what things you're doing it make you feel happy that but bring a smile to your face they don't feel like a chore because you.

Will:
[35:19] It's not a burden right.

Sarah:
[35:21] Not a burden and that could be anything there is no right or wrong list my list looks way different than Wills list that's gonna look way different than your list some of you are like I love cleaning the bathroom that brings me life I'd say that would be a life sucker to me but to you if that's you awesome like.

Will:
[35:35] And you know what you might actually feel guilty when you do it because if you are a people pleaser or you want to just not create conflict or whatever you going to give you an out
you might feel guilty by saying yes to yourself in this thing that fulfills you and that actually might be a good tell that it's a good thing because you don't want to prioritize it,
over taking care of someone else or do some chore do something on your to-do list take care of yourself,
absolutely and meet something that's meaningfully refreshing to yourself that you,
and that time or that thing that you do or whatever just getting away and you feel like I can breathe again those those red flags we stared earlier those lift from you that's usually a good a good thing.

Sarah:
[36:13] So we'll what is something for you that's on your life giving less.

Will:
[36:16] It's got to be like a nature quiet time for me a few weeks ago I just told I think I told you I was like I'm going to get away on Monday morning or Sunday morning over the day was I need to go on a hike I'm going to be gone for four hours,
I'm doing it and there was all these reasons why I could have said no but I had to do it getting out in nature quiet nobody else around me that's a big one for me.

Sarah:
[36:35] So I had a few at the end of the day there's a lot of things but these were kind of the four for me that I knew in this season I just needed to make a really big,
in covid time we finally guys I love a porch swing and I've wanted a porch swing.
My whole life and so we did some work on the front of our house so that we could have a porch swing I have a porch swing and a rocker rocking chair and so one of my goals for a long time has been to spend as much time on my front porch as I can,
obviously I can't live there but I try to really good day is like I can sit on that front porch for 30 minutes and you know what I do I'm sitting there,
nothing,
like I sit there and I think sometimes I read sometimes one of my kids come out and we talked and I have had some amazing conversations right on that front porch sometimes with people,
and sometimes just me and God and so for me that was something that's like I got to get to the porch swing I got to get to the porch swing time with family I really do just spending time now again sometimes,
that's not always life-giving because you know kids are kids God love them.

[37:42] Finding ways to get on their level and and do things so like we got to go one thing that was really fun because we got to go to the pool our neighborhood has a pool,
and we got to go and we got dinner and we met up at the pool after work and it was just really great the pool actually ended up needing some work done it was a whole thing but we were just there we actually the older two girls were gone we just had the little too,
but just spending some time with them and this is what I would say.
Sometimes as a parent we just got to suck it up and do the things our kids want to do whether we like it or not and I'm not a great player like with can never have been like it's really hard for me,
but I've learned okay how can I find things that they like and I like and it compromises the little bit on both and so like the pool,
I mean that was a great way for us to spend time together have conversation we got to have dinner and then they got to run and play will and I got some time together and it was kind of a win-win across the.

Will:
[38:33] Yeah and it wasn't expensive then that's something I want to share is this thing and and wireless until Wild at Heart it's a podcast they write books and things like that but they shared a couple things one that I was
key for me is the cost to Joy ratio you don't have to do something super expensive to receive Joy from it us going to the pool,
acosta's whatever Chick-fil-A dinner was and the pool was free for us it's in our neighborhood we didn't have to make a cross-country trip or plan something to the amusement park or the water park or whatever keep the costs low you can still receive Joy
and I have a meeting fully refreshing activity to do.

Sarah:
[39:09] Another thing on my list is what will said is time outside like I really do and so time on my front porch is outside and just extra time like one thing that was super life-giving is over Memorial Day weekend we got a chance to go.

Will:
[39:18] World a week.

Sarah:
[39:20] Version of Camping series version of camping it wasn't an.

Will:
[39:22] Which always includes AC and indoor plumbing just so you know and electricity.

Sarah:
[39:27] But I love outside this is what I will tell people friends I will be outside all day,
every day but when I come inside at night I would like to have a little bit I don't necessarily need air conditioning I just want to have a clean shower and but I want the outside to stay outside and my ma.

Will:
[39:40] I want the outside to stay outside but inside would be inside so I'm happy to be out.

Sarah:
[39:42] To be inside so I'm happy to be out all day all hours running around crazy bugs all the stuff dirt I don't care but when I go inside I want to take a shower and feel like I'm inside.

Will:
[39:51] But you won't touch the fish and you won't touch the beat.

Sarah:
[39:55] I try guys I'm learning.
But we just got to go be outside and spend a couple days and you know what we did like nothing the kids ran around and we fished and we read.

Will:
[40:03] This great fish really good.

Sarah:
[40:06] Conversations around the fire pit and it was just a great time now I know that's not feasible for everybody all the time but again with this is like fine things for you and like what we'll just said they don't have to all be expensive
I think so no matter your your time situation or your money situation
my good friend Christy boulware who is on our podcast you'll love that I would say that she had to saying I don't know if its original to her but we're going to say it is is that your pause is your priority so like there's a way for you to find
something some way shape or form I take a little bit of energy to try to figure out what it is but find the things you love and my last thing is just I really am a super.
Creative person,
it took me a long time to realize that about myself cuz always be like Oh I'm not as creative that that person so I'm not creative but I am an idea generator and I like to do just something creative and so for me.
It could be going to sit at the piano for 15 minutes and just either playing worship songs that I already know or just fiddle around with Tunes in what comes out it might be a little painting project or I don't know but just I need some kind of little bit of creative.
And so doing that and finding a way to do that really does bring me life leading worship is a creative thing right now I used to be a worship leader and get the lead worship all the time and now I'm in the season where I'm getting I don't get to do that as much and so.

Will:
[41:28] So when I get to do that it is.

Sarah:
[41:30] Is very very life-giving to me it's not a chore or work,
brings all life so find some things that bring you life that you can do even if it's for 10 minutes it's like hey I need to go take a bath or I'm just going to go take a walk around the block.
And if you're married talk to your spouse or if you're a single mom or,
you know maybe find a friend that says hey could you just come for one hour every week and hang with my kids so I could just go do this thing or if you're single man just make it a priority like what can I do in this season right now to just,
do a couple life-giving things and it goes along.

Will:
[42:09] It's good to wrap up.

Sarah:
[42:10] I know we covered a lot of ground in this was just short we kind of talked about our life in the midst of other things,
and I just want you to know like will and I really are like we're thinking about you guys and we're praying for you I actually want to,
tell a story that actually was the Catalyst to this so let me come back to the podcast because like we said when it got really crazy and busy and there's a lot of things this just kind of had to stop,
um
It was hard but like literally there was no brain power like I couldn't even begin to muster like I said sadly you haven't even seen any social media post from us because it was just like,
this was the one thing that could could stop and I had a little control over we had control over any of the stop.

[42:55] We have been so blessed by hearing from some of you about the stories and just what the conversations we have shared have meant to you and so I want to say first of all thank you.
With us we are not doing it for the things we're doing it we told you guys the beginning we feel like we're being obedient to what God has just called us to do in this season and so we are going to get back at it but we had a friend I'm going to call her a bee,
reach out and left us just a really incredible voice mail and her and her family are in the middle of the really really hard season,
and my heart just broke for them really because we know what it's like to be in hard Seasons where you just honestly feel like every day you're like well what's going to happen today what new thing is going,
what new things going to happen you're afraid to answer your phone because you never know what's going to happen and I know that a lot of you listening might feel like you're in that season,
friend a b she left us this message and it really was I listen to it tears in my eyes showed it to Will.
You were emotional about it and I just said that's it we have to do this like this podcast needs to move into the life-giving category which it always has been it was just like I said necessity yes needed.

Will:
[44:10] Energy yes needed per season.

Sarah:
[44:13] And so I just want to give the reminder we talk around here a lot like you never know what your words are what you're doing or what you might be in how,
actually in the middle of that might help somebody else so here is this person who is going through really really really hard things and she took a second and reached out and,
in gave life to Will and,
and so that's just our hope with this we hope from a little bit of ushering some of our story just the Highlight the High View we didn't there's so much more we could tell you but a few of just the things that,
we hope that it encourages you to courage's you one to know like you are not alone.
Oftentimes our circumstances make us feel like that like I'm the only one and no one would understand and we assume I tell you you are not alone,
and that just to reach out to somebody if you are really struggling in your spot find a friend maybe it's a pastor at a church maybe there's a friend maybe there's a co-worker uterus,
and just find somebody to talk to about it a little bit and get some advice and get some wisdom and just have some camaraderie with somebody.
Will I want to share a couple resources for our friends so we'll rent mention John Eldridge they have a podcast called Wild at Heart that he has a book,
that I have been reading through did you read it I don't know if you've read it you've listened to maybe some podcast about it it's called.

Will:
[45:41] Get your life back yeah I can share something about.

Sarah:
[45:43] Will show put it in the show notes it is a great book I would highly recommend you reading it get your.
He also talks about so I heard this on the podcast at first it's called the pause app so go look for.

Will:
[45:55] 100%.

Sarah:
[45:58] Trust me it's a free app if you do nothing else whether you're in the best spot or the worst spot right now go download this app and I know it sounds dumb but it will change your life well.

Will:
[46:10] Yeah and I want to say that all the things we've talked about in this episode,
is not just for recovering from a difficult season that's that's a reaction I want to encourage you all to put
practices in your life that helps you to prevent being from those Dark Places again or maybe if you're going through a struggle right and for me the pause app has been one of just a very small handful of practices that has really helped me
to stay healthier so that I can you know withstand some of the hard times that we've gone through really really simple really easy to use and really life-giving.

Sarah:
[46:48] It starts off at a minute and one of my favorite things and I love it it combines something that I was already doing which is it's just taking a moment to breathe.
And I know that sounds so dumb and I have some of your like really I need to take a pause to breathe yes.

Will:
[47:03] Yes you do yes I do.

Sarah:
[47:04] Resounding yes because what it does especially as when you're in fight or flight mode it gives you a moment to pause,
and by that deep breathing it is not just a spiritual practice there are physical scientific.

Will:
[47:16] Scientific yes.

Sarah:
[47:18] Proven benefits to taking a moment to take several long and slow deep breaths as to what it does to your whole physical.
Go read about it it's incredible but do it and it builds you up through pauses and it's just it's really really good so get your life.
The pause app will link all of that there's another book I've read in the season it's one of my favorite podcasts to listen to is that sounds fun bye Annie,
and she wrote a book by the same name that sounds fun and it's just a really quick read really short little chapters about different things she says a lot of,
things in there about fun that will and I didn't even touch on or something but he's been huge to me about,
man what are you doing it's kind of the life-giving things where are you just going to have some fun when was the last time you've just done something to be an amateur about it like that you weren't trying to.

Will:
[48:11] Take a risk it's okay.

Sarah:
[48:11] For or do something you just done whatever and so it was super encouraging to me if you remember I told you my word for this year is safe which really means.
Put yourself in some unsafe situations is that it's the idea that you are always safe with God period And so you need to put yourself in some situations that are maybe do,
safe to you and so that book was just a great exclamation mark to me on some of the things that God was already leading and sharing with me so I recommend that there's also a lady Ruth Haley Barton.
She has written several books she has a podcast she talks a lot a great great detail just about rest and and why it is so important and why sometimes it's so hard for us to do it and so those are just a few resources we would recommend will.

Will:
[48:56] Well yeah I have two resources as well as we're talking about the yeses in the nose Greg McKeown's Essentialism has been a life-changing book for me so we'll put that in the show notes as well,
and part of the Wild at Heart Ministries they have this thing called the daily prayer
I've been able to practice for the last almost five years and it's been super helpful for that kind of prevent prevent defense of just how you go through your life but whether whatever you practice you put into your life
if you can understand who you are and whose you are you're going to be a lot more equipped to be able to deal with the hard things and the good things in your life yes so check.

Sarah:
[49:31] Call those out so,
in conclusion here we go so here's the big news that you need to know Season 2 oh now that's something good podcast is coming back really soon we will have a day,
for you soon so this podcast me listen to it will be on a Wednesday we will have a few more weeks off and then we're going to jump right back into doing one of our favorite things is sharing people's stories about how God,
does extraordinary things out of the everyday ordinary our church is reading through the New Testament together and we are in the book of Acts and last week I believe
just read the scripture again that is where part of that heart comes from about how.
Was in Peter I don't know how to go back I'll read you the verse but basically the disciples had been in and these guys in the the court were like.
Is with these guys they must have been with Jesus and they said they are just ordinary.

Will:
[50:25] Uneducated unschooled yep.

Sarah:
[50:26] And I love that but and they said but they've been with Jesus,
and that is our hope and heart that man out of the ordinariness of Our Lives that Jesus would be seen and it's in him and through him that extraordinary things happen so we can't wait to tell you we've got a list of people that we are,
share have them share their story and can't wait to get back to doing that so you can expect that probably sometime in July August will be back to regularly.
And we can't wait because we really do love this and we are so thankful like we said,
for each and every one of you for being along with us on this crazy now that something good journey and we're excited to continue to share stories.
See you soon.